chicago nightmare
by nerdgirl1031
Summary: When Sylvie Brett begins having nightmares and flashback of things that happened in the past can her friends at firehouse 51 help her through it or will they be too late? Trigger warning: MAY BE SOME MENTIONS OF RAPE AND SUICIDAL THOUGHTS
1. Chapter 1

"Ahh" Sylvie Brett woke up with a scream as she began to feel the tears began to pool in her eyes.

She tried to take calming breaths as she had just relived what her "father" did to her as a young girl. Sylvie shook her head trying to get the images out of her head and calm down before her roommates came to check on her.

"Sylvie?" Joe Cruz yelled through the door as he knocked. Sylvie sighed. She had woken them up.

"Y-yeah" Sylvie stuttered still nervous about everything.

"Are you okay" Cruz yelled back. "you don't sound okay. Do you need help?!"

"I'm fine Joe." Sylvie said quieter than she should have.

"You sure?" Cruz yelled again. "Do you need me to come in?".

"Just go back to bed Cruz!" Sylvie snapped she didn't need to be babied. She was fine it was in the past anyway.

She heard Cruz walk away as she threw the covers off of her and walked to her window. The cold Chicago night had frosted up her window a little bit and snow was beginning to fall. Sylvie could feel the tears beginning again but couldn't do anything to stop them this time. She walked over to her bed side table where her phone was. It was only 3:42 am. She still had about 2 hours until she had to be awake for work. She threw on her biggest hoodie and sat on the floor unable to bring herself to sit in her bed. Sylvie felt herself staring into space as unwanted images and memories played in her head.


	2. Chapter 2

Dawson"!" Cruz yelled as Otis trailed behind him when Dawson had just left the locker room and was bout to get coffee.

"What's up?" She asked turning around to face the two men.

"Have you seen Sylvie today?" Otis asked.

"Um no. why? Is she okay." Dawson responded as she immediately felt concern for her friend.

"We don't know" Otis answered.

"She came to the firehouse on her own today and didn't carpool with us. She didn't eat breakfast and didn't make her morning coffee, which she always has, and last night at like 3:30 i think she woke up screaming and when i asked if she was okay she just kind of yelled at me." Cruz said in one breath.

"Okay I'll talk to her." Dawson said as she thought about what could be wrong.

"Thanks Dawson." Cruz replied as he walked past Dawson into the locker room. With Otis behind him.

Dawson was concerned to say the least. Her mind was racing as she contemplated everything that could be wrong. Sylvie was terrible at keeping secrets and her and Dawson shared everything with each other.

Sylvie was standing towards the back of the Ambo leaning against it and Dawson had never seen her look worse. Her curly blond hair was tied up into a messy bun on top of her head and she had dark rings around her eyes. Just then the alarms sounded.

"Ambulance 61; man down due to unknown causes"

The two women rushed into the ambulance and Sylvie made no effort to get into the drivers seat so Dawson prepared herself to drive.

As Gabby backed into the firehouse she saw Sylvie staring into space. The young blond hadn't said anything during the drive to or from the firehouse and only talked when they were helping a man who had fallen.

"You okay? Your not sick right?" Gabby questioned trying to start some sort of conversation.

"I'm fine" Sylvie muttered not taking her eyes of whatever she was looking at.

"You sure you look exhausted? Maybe we can stop for coffee after our next run?" Gabby pushed.

"I don't care" Sylvie muttered again.

"Sweetie, are you okay? You know you can tell me anything right?" Gabby said after parking the Ambo looking after her friend. Sylvie has tears in her eyes and refuses to look at the Latina.

Sylvie just nodded as she got out of the Ambo and walked straight into firehouse. As gabby followed her inside she saw the bathroom door close and Sylvie nowhere to be seen.

"Rough call?" Gabby heard her husband say as she turned around to see him.

"No" she replied as she walked towards Matt Casey.

"Then why did Brett run in here looking like she was about to burst into tears." Casey asked looking down at his petite wife.

"Otis and Cruz asked me to ask Sylvie if she was okay because she was distant this morning and last night woke up screaming. So i asked if she was okay she said she was fine so i said she looked tired maybe we can run and get coffee after our next call and she looked like she was about to cry. She hardly talked to me except when we were treating the patient and I'm worried." Gabby said letting out a big breathe when she finished.

"Okay take a breath. I think she went into the bathroom so why don't you just go in and check on her and if she still doesn't open up give her time. She'll come to you eventually." Casey said as he put a comforting arm on Dawson's shoulder.

"Okay I'll go see her. Thanks babe." Gabby replied as she reached up to kiss her husband.


	3. Chapter 3

She jogged slightly to reach the bathroom and began to check all the stall before stumbling on the last one. Sylvie was half hunched over the toilet with a few tears leaking out of her eyes and a distant look in her stare.

"Sylvie? Hun? Are you okay?" Dawson asked crouching down next to her friend brushing the hair away from her face. The young blonde flinched at the contact and made eye contact with Gabby for a split second before looking down again.

"Why don't you call in a sub for the day. I'm sure chief won't mind if your sick. And you can talk to me about anything." Gabby said removing her hand from her friends face.

"I'm fine" Sylvie muttered.

"Sylvie. I need you to be honest with me." Dawson firmly stated knowing the blond was not fine.

"I-i can't say" Sylvie stuttered her breathing beginning to become erratic.

"Hey hey hey. " gabby began wanting her friend to calm down. "Shhh. Just take a breath you don't have to tell—"

"Hello ladies. Didn't know we did bathroom parties here" Stella Kidd said waking into the bathroom. "Am i interrupting something here"

Sylvie just hugged her knees to her chest and tucked her face away almost embarrassed.

"Brett?" Stella asked almost shocked.

"I'm fine, everyone just go I'll be out in a minute" Sylvie muttered quietly the two women had to strain to here her.

"Are you sure?" Gabby asked "Mmhm" Sylvie hummed in response.

The two brunettes walked out of the bathroom and into the bunks shocked by what had just occurred.

"What- what just happened?" Stella asked confused about everything.

"I don't know. She seemed off today and Cruz said she woke up screaming last night, and so I asked her what was wrong in the ambo after our run and then Matt said she looked like she was going to cry. So I went to find her and she was puking. 5 minutes later you came In." Gabby summarized still confused. Stella opened her mouth to answer as Sylvie walked out of bathroom. Except the young blonde didn't stop.

She continued walking right into the bunks when she got a phone call. Jumping slightly Sylvie looked at the caller ID. "BLOCKED" Sylvie answered anyway and out the phone up to her ear.

"Sylvie Annemarie Brett" the voice on the other side of the phone whispered harshly. "I expect you to be a good girl. I don't need to come and visit. Right?"

"Right" the young blonde muttered terrified.

"That is not how you respond to your superiors!" The voice roared.

"Yes father." Sylvie said slightly louder this time.

"Good." The voice said. "You better hope i don't run into you. You will regret it." The line went dead and Sylvie could only sit on her bed and stare at the black screen. Terrifying thoughts wove themselves throughout the young women's head as she tried not to think about what her father had done to her.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: in this chapter Sylvie is suffering with ptsd almost and it based off of my after thoughts and how I reacted when I went through something similar.**

 **Thoughts are in italics**

 **If anyone ever needs to talk I'm here**

"Anything yet?" Cruz questioned as he walked towards Dawson, who was cooking in the kitchen.

"Not really. I mean she had a complete breakdown in the bathroom today. Like full panic attack, crying, puking everything." Dawson described the scene that took place earlier as she continued to fry chicken.

"Do you think it has anything to do with her ex? Remember when she first moved here and he kept getting handsy with her? Joe considered as her racked his brain for any possibility for what could be causing his friend so much pain.

"I don't think so. I feel like she would have gone to Chief with that. Especially if it happened at the fire house. Plus you or Otis would see her ex if he showed up at your apartment.

"True True. Anybody else know yet." Joe asked knowing the young Latinas ability to keep secrets is minimal.

"Just Matt. And Stella because she walked into the bathroom before." The Latina said becoming defensive.

"Okay, Okay." Joe said putting his hands up as he began to walk out of the room. "Ill see if I can talk to her."

"Last I saw her she was in the bunks!" Gabby yelled as Joe headed in that direction.

Turning her attention back to dinner, the young women began to think of possible reasons for her friends continuing downward spiral.

"Hey Brett." Cruz said somewhat loudly as he entered the bunk room. Although Sylvie showed no signs of hearing him. She just continued staring tiredly at her pale hands.

"Brett" The young man tried again as he got closer.

Joe decided to place a hand on his blonde friends shoulders but as soon as he did she flinched making her bed shift and moved back against the head board, staring at her roommate with wild eyes.

"Brett its just me. Its okay." Joe said backing away from his friend scared to frighten her anymore.

"S-s-so-sor-sorry J-Joe. I-I-I di-didn't me-mean t-to." Sylvie stuttered, cursing herself for jumping.

 _"_ _It's just Cruz you idiot. Now he's going to know that something is wrong"_ Sylvie said to herself in her head.

"No worries, seriously don't sweat it. I just wanted to come see how you were doing?" Cruz said staying back from the bed.

"Im fine just a little tired." Sylvie lied.

"You sure? Why don't you take a nap. Even if its a quick one." Cruz said becoming concerned for his friend once again.

"You sure?" Sylvie asked as if she was unsure of herself.

"Yeah! Of course." Joe said as he walked put of the bunk room.

Walking away the heavier man kept his head down. His mind was racing as he questioned everything. 'Was she being abused?' 'No I would have know. Or at least seen the signs'

 **"** **Engine 51, Truck 81, Squad 3, ambo 61; Restaurant fire 3245 South Holden Court"**

The alarms woke Sylvie Brett with a start. She jumped out of bed immediately and began walking briskly to the ambulance where her partner was already waiting in the drivers seat.

"How was your nap?" Gabby asked as she pulled away.

"Fine I guess. How long was I out for?" Sylvie asked noticing it was already dark out.

"Four hours, give or take. You sure you can pull through the night?" Dawson asked genuinely concerned for her friend.

"Im fine. Drop it Dawson." Sylvie muttered looking out the window. Her Latina friend glance at her for a second before putting her eyes back on the road, deciding to leave her partner alone.

The next morning Gabby found Sylvie in the bathroom washing her face, looking even worse than yesterday. They didn't have any calls throughout the night s the reason for Sylvie to look worse was unknown the young Latina women. Gabby didn't say anything to Brett though waiting for her to make the first move in the conversation, however the blonde seemed completely oblivious to the fact that her friend was standing only 5 feet away.

"Yo whats up my girl?!" Stella Kidd said rather loudly as Sylvie walked out of the bathroom still hardly noticing anyone.

Dawson threw her hand up in the air as she looked confused at the whole situation.

"Still nothing?" Stella asked seeing Gabby's face.

"No! Why don't you come over for breakfast, I think Matt and Severide are doing something with Boden today and we can talk some more?" The Latina questioned beginning to splash her face with cold water.

"Sounds good. Think you can drive me though, I can in with Kelly yesterday." The tall women asked.

Dawson gave a thumbs up as she began drying her face with a face cloth she had brought with her.

Sylvie sat anxiously on her bed in her bedroom.

 _'_ _Im fine, Cruz and Otis would never hurt me. Or would they? No. No they wouldn't. Im fine."_

She looked ta her phone tempted to call Gabby or Stella. This was the cycle that kept running through her head for the past 3 hours. Finally she picked up the phone and hit the name she was looking for it rang twice before someone answered.

"Hello? Brett you okay?" The voice asked from the other side.

"Gabby. Please. Please come over. I need you." Sylvie whispered, terrified someone would hear her.

 **A/N: Please review and try to make it positive!**


	5. Chapter 5

"Hello? Brett you okay?" Gabby Dawson asked as she answered the phone.

Stella immediately looked up from her plate when she heard her blonde friends name.

"Okay honey. I'll be over as fast as i can I'm gonna bring Stella also. Okay?" Dawson said as she stood up and walked to out her shoes on. As she hung up the phone she yelled, "Stella come on. We're going to Brett's"

"Why? What's going on?" The curly head women asked confused.

"I'm not sure she just said that she needed me." Gabby said as she walked out of the door.

The two women rushed to the car and drove as fast as they can, without breaking the law, to their friends. As soon as the two parked their car they half ran half jogged to their three friends apartment. When they got to the door, finding it locked they began knocking loudly and rapidly.

"Jeez, what is going on? You two miss me already. Its only been 3 hours." Otis announced as he opened the door to the apartment.

"Is Sylvie in her room?" Stella asked ignoring Otis.

"Yea why is she okay?" The Russian man asked. The two women ran to where the blondes room was ignoring the looks from Cruz and questions from Otis.

Gabby ran into Sylvie room with Stella barley a step behind. They saw Sylvie sitting in an empty corner of her room, in the same sweats she left work in, crying her eyes out.

"Hey, honey. What's wrong?" Gabby asked concerned if she was hurt.

"I-I c-can't n-not h-he-here. I c-can't d-do it." Sylvie stuttered her breathing becoming erratic.

Gabby was about to soothe her friend and tell her to take calming breaths but Joe walked in to the room, "Hey Brett. You okay."

Instead of answering, Sylvie's face paled as she pushed herself even further into the corner, her breaths coming out in short little puffs and tears cascading down her face.

"Joe. Can you please go wait outside. Shut the door also." Stella stated without looking away from her friend.

Gabby and Stella didn't want to touch the girl even after their male friend had left, unsure of how she would react.

"Hey, Sylvie, look at me please." Dawson asked softly trying to get the younger girls attention.

"I need you to try and take a deep breath. Is it okay for me and Stella to come sit with you?" Sylvie nodded as she gasped for air, choking on tears. Sylvie kept focusing on her breathing with both of her female friends rubbing her arms and back soothingly.

"You okay now honey?" Stella asked once her friend had calmed down and rested her head against her shoulder. The two women felt their friend nods slowly, almost scared.

"Sylv, I know you don't want to talk about it, but we need to know what caused the panic attack. It was a bad one." Dawson asked fearing the answer.

 _'Her panic attack got out of hand when Cruz walked in. Could he have hurt her? No, he would never. He adores her and so does Otis.'_

"I can't" Sylvie whispered so quietly you had to strain to hear her.

"Yes you can." Stella whispered back but as soon as she felt her friend come tense again she cam up with a new idea, "How about you come back to Gabby's apartment with us. Casey isn't their he is out for the day with Boden. You want to do that?" Stella asked, holding her breath waiting for an answer.

The younger women nodded. Gabby stood up first and and then reached her hands out to help her other friends off of the floor.

"Do you want to pack an overnight bag? You can stay the night with me if you want to?" Gabby asked trying to make eye contact with the girl who was avoiding everyone's eyes.

"Uh-m s-sure. I-if you don't mind." Sylvie uttered hoping her friend wouldn't mind. She just wanted to sleep.

"Of curse I don't mind come on, we can pick some pajamas and an outfit for tomorrow." Gabby announced as she picked up Sylvie's duffle bag off of the floor from work, and opened it allowing Sylvie to pack a sweat shirt and sleep shorts for bed, and leggings and a long sleeve shirt for the following day.

"Come on." Stella said picking up the duffle bag and beginning to walk out of the room when she noticed Sylvie wasn't following her. "Hey its okay. We're just gonna walk to my car okay?" Gabby said as she placed a hand on the small of her friends back.

"Um but- um" Sylvie stuttered "Do you think they will be mad?"

"Who? Cruz and Otis? No!" Stella said as she opened the door. "Do you want me to tell them where we are going before we go? You can stay in the room with Gabby the whole time while I talk to them."

"Yes please" Sylvie said looking up slightly and making a split second eye contact with Stella. When Stella came back into the room after telling the two guys just to be really quiet and not to jumpy when Sylvie came out, that they were going to Dawson's, to say they were concerned was an understatement.

Sylvie burried her face into Gabby's shoulder before walking out, incase her roommates were disappointed in her.

"Hey honey. You can look now we are at the car. Okay? I need to drive but Stella can sit in the back with you or you can sit in the front. Its up to you." Gabby asked.

"Um can you stay with me please, Stell." Sylvie whispered again.

"Yea, yea. Of course. Absolutely. Lets get in." Stella announced as she opened the back door to Dawson's car allowing Sylvie to get in first.

The two women made a brief eye contact across the car.

And they were both thinking the same thing.

What could be going on with Sylvie?

 **A/N: Hello! So I posted twice today (well Yesterday because its one am) but I also posted the day before, so I am trying my best to update this story. It gets a bit challenging because I have so many ideas and so many characters to work with. So please bare with me. Thank you! Love you all!**


	6. Chapter 6

Sylvie stared blankly out the car window.

Not moving.

Barley blinking.

Stella had to check a few times do double check she was breathing.

The only thing the young blonde did was keep a death grip on Stella's hand.

When they got to Gabby's apartment, gabby grabbed Sylvie's over night bag, while Stella helped guide the young women into the apartment building.

When the three women finally reached Gabby's apartment, Sylvie looked a bit more aware of her surroundings.

Once everyone was sitting on the couch for five minutes waiting for the blonde to talk, Gabby finally spoke.

"Sylvie? Honey?" Gabby asked getting to blonde to slightly look up, not making eye contact though, "I know you dont want to, but we need to know what this panic attack was about."

Sylvie shook her head, "I-I can't. You don't understand" she said sounding more and more flustered.

"Hey, it's okay." Stella said

"No. No its not okay. I can't do this. Ill be in trouble. Hell hurt me. I don't want him to hurt me. Please-"Sylvie exclaimed before choking out a sob.

"Honey. It is okay. I need you to take a deep breathe for me. Okay? Just try. In and out." Gabby repeated this mantra numerous more times until Sylvie focused on her face.

"Okay Sylvie did Cruz or Otis hurt you?" Stella asked hating that she even hd to ask the question. But the with the way that she feared the two men had scared the women deeply.

"No! They didn't do anything. I promise." Sylvie replied quickly.

"Okay Sylvie right now you don't have to talk about anything. Why don't I go make some dinner and you and Stella can watch TV and then maybe if you feel up to it, we can talk?" Gabby said standing up hoping the blonde agreed.

"Um yea sure only if thats okay with you two." Sylvie muttered quietly.

"Of course that is okay with us." Still said with sad eyes looking at the young blonde.

"Great ill get on dinner, not sure what it will be yet." Gabby said walking into the kitchen, "Please, put the TV on whatever you two want okay."

As Stella reached towards Sylvie she couldn't help but hate the way that the women flinched. She turned on a comedy movie she had never seen hoping it would calm Sylvie down.

About fifteen minutes later Stella saw Sylvie inching herself towards Stella. Stella just opened her arms allowing Sylvie to lean on her shoulder.

And within the next thirty minutes the young blonde was asleep, exhausted from day spent crying and panicking.

 **AN: Hey guys sorry I haven't posted in a while, I've been struggling in school but your reviews motivate me to keep going. IM also sorry for how short this chapter is I hope to have a new chapter ready by the weekend. THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR CONTINUING LOVE AND SUPPORT!**


	7. Chapter 7

"Honey" Stella whispered louder than the average whisper, "please wake up. Gabby's food is ready and i know your hungry for it."

Sylvie's eyes fluttered opened and she immediately sat up rubbing her eyes. She really didn't feel hungry for the food but knew she should eat something.

Sylvie managed to sit down and eat close to half of the meal before she began to feel sick.

"Stella…." She moaned before clasping her hand over her mouth.

Gabby pushed the small empty garbage can under her friends mouth right before she got sick. After vomiting for about a minute, then dry heaved for another. When she took her head out of the garbage she noticed a glass of water in front of her being held by Stella. Sylvie also recognized the feeling of Gabby's hand on her back.

"Babe. Do you need to see a doctor?" Gabby asked quietly.

"No. No, I'm okay. Im sorry Gabs. I didn't- I liked your food. It was good. I swear, I didn't mean to be sick. It was an accident." Sylvie rushed out in one breathe.

"Hey. I don't care. About you being sick or the food. You ate a lot of it. Thats good." Gabby reassured.

"You sure?" Sylvie sniffed.

" Positive."

"Um. Sylv, do you think you can tell us why you had a panic attack before?" Stella asked.

"Uhm. Yes" Sylvie answered quietly. "But please. You- you cant judge me. I don't want you to look at me differently."

"No one will ever look at you differently. No matter what it is." Stella answered with a serious look on her face.

"Uhm, so you know I was adopted. But it wasn't when I was born. My mom died during child birth. And my dad had resented me for it my whole life. He had raised me but when I turned five, he changed. He became more violent, more- more agitated. He began to touch me." Sylvie began crying a little bit. "He would force himself on me every night touching my top and bottom. I didn't know what to do. I was only five. So I didn't do anything. Until one night I told him no. I was tired and I had wanted to go to bed. He hit me in the face leaving a bruise and split my lip. My teacher noticed and called the cops, and I got adopted a few months later. He called me the other night. He found my phone number. How I don't know. But the nightmares have been worse and I feel terrible because I can't even look at Joe and Otis without feeling like they are going to touch me or hit me."

By this point Sylvie was sobbing. Having a hard time catching her breathe.

"Sylvie just take a deep breathe okay. You can breathe. No one will look at you differently okay? Just. Breathe in for three and out for four." Gabby coached.

It took three minutes for Sylvie to calm down but by the time she did, she was nearly asleep, leaning on Stella and Gabby.

"Fall asleep sweets. We'll be here when you wake up." Gabby whispered running her hand through the blondes hair.

Once Sylvie fell asleep Gabby and Stella began talking.

"She's gonna need to see someone. Maybe Dr.Reese?" Gabby said.

"I'm not sure she would like talking to someone but Reese might be the best option." Stella agreed.

"She's never told anyone about any of this and has been bottling it up." Gabby whispered brushing her hair behind her ear.

"Why don't we get some rest then see about everything in the morning?" Stella asked.

"Sounds good hun" Gabby mumbled.

Stella laughed quietly at the Latina who was practically asleep already and closed her eyes herself.

 ** _An: thank you guys for all the support. I'm already working on the next chapter. Hope you all have a happy and healthy holiday season and a happy new year_**

 ** _An update: i tried uploading 12/23/18 and i just realized that it never uploaded. I'm so so sorry._**


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